Sammy is fast asleep and Dave is checking over the dishwasher and skimming the manual before he and my dad install it tomorrow, so I decided to read through all of my previous posts (not difficult--there were only like 6)! I didn't realize how wonderful it would be to be reminded of yesterday's me and realize how far she has come. I started this blog because I was setting out on a new chapter in life, and to look back at who I was and the fears that plagued me...whew! I cried as I recalled those first months of returning to work...the guilt, the fears, the unknown coupled with the memories, the students, the growth. I made it through. Not because of who I am. Not because of anything I've done. I made it because He promises that with Him ALL things are possible. I made it because He promised me that He will never leave me. I made it because of who He is. Period. I think about this last year, and the only thing that comes to mind is His presence. Gosh!...I felt Him near in some of my darkest moments. I felt His presence when I was challenged by some of my toughest students, and I felt His presence when I watched those same students walk across the stage to receive their diplomas. I felt His presence when Sammy woke up with 103 degree fevers and double ear infections, and that same presence was with me when Sammy would hug my leg, look up and say "I uv you!"
I realize, on the grand scheme of things, that leaving my child for a few hours a day (to add: in the care of the most amazing women, while doing a rewarding job that God has called me to, and coming home to an honest and loving husband/father in our awesome house as well as having the love from a zillion family and friends) is not really that traumatic, so some reading what I write may be rolling the eyes. On the other hand, others may think that I am the most heartless and horrible woman for leaving my child for part of the day. Regardless, I am confident that I am right where He would have me to be. And really...on the grand scheme of things...what else matters?
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