True Confessions of a Mom

When I was in college, in mid-western Springfield, Missouri, my floor-mates and I would entertain ourselves by playing a game of "True Confessions". We would sit in a circle on one of our door room floors and each write a few probing questions on slips of paper. We would then take turns answering these questions--some silly, some serious, some down right ridiculous--all in an effort to not only amuse ourselves, but to also get to know one another on a deeper level. I sometimes miss living in those days of complete transparency.

A friend of mine brought lunch over last week, and we got on a discussion about motherhood. We began talking about the sometimes challenging moments of raising a toddler--especially those moments in public when all you want to do is run and hide when your child decides to become a monster right before your eyes--and right before the eyes of everyone in Target! This discussion got me thinking: if every mom has these moments, why aren't we more supportive of one another and transparent with one another? Instead, we stare, we judge, we accuse, and we assume.

So...after reading the words of Ann Voskamp this morning, I have been inspired to confess some of the reasons why my home isn't perfect and why I am not the perfect mom:

1.  I rarely fold laundry (with the exception of kid clothes because they are so tiny and so easy to lose track of). It is sorted in baskets in the laundry room. It is clean. But, I confess, it hardly ever gets folded. We dig for what we want to wear. We "fluff" it in the drier to get the wrinkles out (or sometimes iron in extreme cases).
2. I dust when it is visible...usually when I walk into a room and the sun hits the bookshelf just right--that is when I dust.
3. My 3 yr. old goes to bed without brushing his teeth sometimes. If he is having a rough night or it is late, it gets forgotten. (This one makes me feel pretty guilty, I admit).
4. I confess that one time, while at the zoo, Sammy went through so many diapers that I ran out and had to put a used one (pee only) back on him until we got home.
5. My over 3 yr. old still isn't fully potty trained. I include this on the list because there seems to be a race among moms over who can get their kid potty trained at the youngest age. My son knows all the letters, their sounds, can read a few words, knows his colors, yada, yada, yada, but he won't poop on the potty. Big deal. He'll get it when he is ready just like all kids will know their letters and colors at some point. Development isn't a race.
6. I feed my son pizza once a week probably (store bought or homemade). He is pretty picky these days...I need one meal without a battle.
7. I often forget to wipe down the booster seat after dinner. It is usually caked with yogurt or sauce for a couple days until I realize how messy it really is.
8. Sometimes there are so many goldfish (or other cracker variety) scattered inside the car (even though I swore I would never let my kids eat in the car--haha.) that I will catch Sammy snacking on an old treat. Sigh.

The list could go on, but I should probably end here. My point is, no mom is perfect and very few homes--at least the ones where kids are being raised and loved on--look like a carbon copy of some magazine spread or department store showroom. I do know that I love my kids with a love that overflows and makes me weepy and happy and in awe of the God who thought it right and good to put two little boys in my care.

True Confessions?...

Twenty years from now, I want my kids to have learned how to love others--their friends, their wives, their children, strangers--because they first saw it reflected in me and Dave. They won't remember the crumbs. They won't remember the unfolded laundry. They will remember the love.

 "Sin is what happens when our love gets disordered. And it’s never worth disordering the heart to get a right-ordered house...How is my love ordered? Towards a Better Homes and Gardens House? Or a better, holy, godly heart?...A right-ordered house isn’t virtuous like a right-ordered heart" -Voskamp

"We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19